I have been doing alot of thinking this weekend and I want to know if all men have brain damage or does something in the parenting not get through to them.
Since when are humans born with a remote control as part of their hand?
Since men sit and stand and women sit and sit doesn't that mean there is a better chance the next person is going to need the toilet seat down?
Who told men that their shirt was just a napkin that they conveniently carried around with them at all times?
When did causing a smell so horrible that you are left in a room by yourself become a badge of honor?
When did Tide team up with Whirlpool and decide that warm equals clean?
Have we gone to the dark ages and there really are only 2 television stations left in the world? And why are they ESPN and the NFL Network?
How do you walk around the house with only 1 sock on and not know where the other one went?
What is wrong with men's underwear that it only gets "broken in" once it has holes in it? Are they making it of burlap now?
Why is it OK that just because there is no one there to get your rebound that when you miss shooting your clothes at the hamper they should stay where they land?
When did ketchup become a vegetable?
Have your twigs and berries become so fragile that you must touch them to make sure they are still there every 5 minutes?
Why do bodily functions require reading material?
When did gas production become a sport requiring a score or grade?
Do men have any senses besides smell? I do and if something looks gross why would I want to smell it?
Where is the rule written that once you purchase a new video game that all other life must stop until you master this game?
How can you watch TV while sleeping? And how can you not be sleeping when you are snoring with your eyes closed?
Why is it that just because you do something stupid it must be "that time of the month"? When it comes to your stupidity would that be a month-long thing?
Why must you try and repair things that are beyond the scope of your expertise? Don't you know the repairman I am going to have to call after you mess it up is most likely going to be a man also?
These are the questions that have been floating around my mind this weekend. Now I am going to go take a Xanax and try to recover.
Ahhhhhhhhh dearheart don't you know it is simply because they are MEN and you should not bother to try to figure them out lest you give yourself a stroke!
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